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Thursday, October 1, 2009

~ I Lost It ~

Yesterday I done something I never have done before.I yelled at my step-son Jared. He is 19 and of course the great age for knowing everything. I was having a not so good day. I guess you would call it a very emotional day for me. Here lately lots of things have been bothering me and I'm not usually like this. We have been having some issues at home with him but I just sorta try to stay out of it and let my husband handle it. Jared helps out alot with the older kids, like if he isn't working all the kids sorta hang out together which is good. Jared was only 13 when I met him and for the past 4 yrs he has lived with us. I felt really bad after I did it but then I felt to like I had a of stress lifted. Not to go into alot of details but Jared's Mom lives in Ohio and she never calls , e-mails or tries to get in touch with him. I always feel bad like how could you not talk to one of your kids that you carried inside you for 9 months. I know if it was me I would wonder no matter how old he or she was , just what was going on in there life. He graduated in 2008 and she never said anything. The funny thing is before my husband today & his x-wife split up Jared was like her favorite. Well yesterday after I got upset the kids & I went to run some errands. Jared went to work. I called my husband later and told him what happened. Jared came home from work and didn't speak to me, I thought maybe it's better that way for now. This morning Jared got up and he acted like nothing happened. He has been better today and maybe yesterday just needed to happen. So maybe it was a good thing I lost it , I just don't like being like that.

7 comments :

April said...

I certainly am not going to pretend to know what it's like to have to discipline children - since I have only been having to do it for about 2 weeks now :) Personally, I do agree with how you have been handling things lately, it isn't really your position to say much, that is more your husband's role - especially since Jared is grown. But if something needed to be said, and you felt that what you said/did was necessary - than it was. I am sure whatever you said DID affect Jared, since he still seemed to be thinking about it after work. A lot of times that "ignoring" in teenagers can also be "embarrassment and a little shame" too. I am glad to hear things are different this morning. I hope you don't have to get put into that uncomfortable position often! Have a better day Caroline!

Adrienne said...

Hey- it happens,dont' beat yourself up- you're doing a great job with all of your children!! Thanks for adding the button btw!:)

Franchesca Cox said...

Praying for you and yours. It's ok to have emotional days/weeks/months/minutes... Lots of love

XX

Linda said...

I think he will respect you in the end for caring enough to try to help him. It seems his mom doesn't make the effort, and someone needs too.

All of this would be hard. Hold on to the Lord and be under the umbrella of your husband's protection and authority,...and both of you under the Lord's.

Just love Jared and pray... A LOT!
Oh, and you might apologize to Jared for yelling, but stand firm to your beliefs.

Elizabeth Mahlou said...

You lost it? Everyone does at some point. And you know what? Kids know that, and they adjust and forgive. That's the great thing about human relations -- we get to be human and we get to forgive.

Holly said...

It's definitely difficult with stepchildren in the mix. I will correct Hannah but major discipline I leave to Anthony as I feel it isn't my place.

Don't worry about losing it! We all have those moments!

Kelci said...

Well, if you didn't care, you wouldn't lose it! I think I lose it daily. I strive to do better, but I sort of grew up in an angry home. Not my mom, but my dad. That's the only way he handled things. He hit and screamed and yelled. I hate that I have even a little bit of that in me, but at times I fail and I do. I just keep praying that tomorrow I will do better. I think that overall I turned out okay in spite of how my father disciplined, but I still feel like that's the part of being a parent that I wish I didn't get from him. I forgive him and love him dearly. Unfortunately his dad was the same way, but even worse. It's sad that it just keeps going. I hope that I can break the cycle!
Hugs,
Kelci

 
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