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Wednesday, January 4, 2012

December 28 2011

December 28 , 2011

I have a little something special with the number 28. It seems like I can have good or bad things on that number.

It wasn't a special day but Thaniqua & I had run to Walmart to get groceries. We were almost done & I decided I need to go to the bathroom. No big deal but just so I don't go into to much info , I haven't had a period for over a year. I'm getting older and so I just thought maybe it was my body quitting on it's own. My Dr told me as long as I felt fine I should be ok. I don't have my yearly til Spring.

Well I was bleeding but not a lot. So we finished shopping came home & it only got worse. I called my Mom even though she was over 2000 miles away I wanted to ask her what she thought.

That evening it was worse so I went to be checked out. I found out something I didn't want to hear. I lost a child another baby. I wondered how this could happen no period but somehow it had. I had my first child Ridge & had no signs of being pregnant. A lot of people still find it hard to believe but it happened. Anyway I decided I was in shock to much & I didn't feel like writing about it until now.

A week ago we said Goodbye to our little Rosebud. They say I was only 8 wks or so & I miscarried. I'm better but mentally I'm still trying to cope w / another loss. It hurts , It is raw & still so hard to believe. We told the children & they are doing ok.
I still wonder Why ????

Wish I could have stopped it but God knows those answers so I have to trust him. It's hard this life at times so unfair but then again there will be a day we will all be together as a family.

My cousin emailed me this picture from Florida the same day this happened. I think it didn't just happen maybe she knew I needed something peaceful to look at. She knows how much I love things like this.

Rosebud ~ December 28 , 2011
I will look forward to the day I can meet you Sweet Baby
Love you
Mommy

I know a lot of you never thought this would be what I would post about but even though I know God is Good & we are blessed yet broken at the same time.

If you are friends with me on Facebook I only ask that you don't say anything on there . Just not ready for all the public & since sometimes a lot of drama on there. Thank you so much.
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8 comments :

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Caroline, I am so sorry. My heart is yours and I will be praying for your comfort. ((HUGS))

That corgi :) said...

(((Caroline))) I am so sorry too. I thought it would be something good with the end of the year recap, nothing that was so much sadness to you and yours. I can't even imagine. I am glad you got the picture from your cousin; I am sure God inspired her to send it to you, knowing you would need something like that on this hard day. It is hard to trust God when things like this don't make sense, yet I know you do trust in him. I wish I had the answers, I don't. All I can do is send a hug and let you know I am soooo sorry :(

betty

Kristin said...

Caroline, my heart is just aching for you. I am so sorry. I'm praying for the lord to comfort you in the way that only he can. If you get a chance, I've been meaning to get your address if you can email it to me. Sending hugs to you.

Trennia said...

(((hugs)))
I am so,so sorry,Caroline.
I will be praying for you,even more.My heart goes out to you.

Debbie said...

Oh my gosh, Caroline!!!! This is so sad and shocking! I'm so sorry. I will be praying for you. ~Debbie

Crystal Theresa said...

oh sweetie, i'm so sorry. your precious little Rosebud <3. i know this sweet baby is waiting to meet you in heaven along with your other little ones. but it doesn't take away the hurt and the surprise. sending you lots of love.

Holly said...

Im so sorry hun :(
praying for you and sending my love

Sarita Boyette said...

Caroline, dear, I had no idea what heartache the end of 2011 had brought to you and your family. I'm just devastated for you! My prayers are with you - wish I was there to give you a big hug. Wish you did not have to go through any more sadness. Love to all of you and may the Lord uplift you as only He can.

 
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